As the year 2020 approaches, I wanted to give you all my list of things we as SLiens (members of Second Life for those of you who are unfamiliar), really REALLY need to leave behind and allow to die with 2019.

  • 1. Fighting over muthafuggas you’ve never actually met in person.

Why in the entire fuck would you allow yourself to be caught up fussing and fighting with anyone else over someone you’ve never actually even laid eyes on??? Someone explain it to me, please! ESPECIALLY when y’all have no idea how to keep a confrontation private but that’s another item on my list that I’ll discuss later. Y’all just gotta take it to social media and make yourselves look extra EXTRA silly. I say, if we must fight over a lover (side-eyes that idea), we at least let it be a lover who we’ve actually had sex with in real life, not an assistant masturbator. Yes, an assistant masturbator is exactly what your SL lover is if you’ve never been in their physical presence. You’re literally arguing over emotes/voice that help your hand(s) bring you to orgasm. Sounds silly as fuck doesn’t it?? Cause it IS!! STOP IT!

  • 2. Criticizing others for the way they choose to make their SecondLife avatar look.

Second Life is literally a fantasy world. If a muthafugga wanna walk around with a tiny ass head on top of a pile of muscles looking like Conan had a baby by Hercules who then got cursed by a New Orleans voodoo priest who shrunk his head, let him live!! If a bitch wanna walk around with her ass dragging the ground behind her and her titties punching her in the face every time she moves, so what?! We can be whatever we want here! They’re not hurting anybody and besides, you wouldn’t want them fucking with you about that wide ass gap y’all insist on having between your thighs as if it’s cute or how 98% of y’all walk around with permanent frowns on your faces looking like someone just ran over your puppy so leave them alone. STOP IT!

  • 3. Walking around here with your avatar looking like who did it and why.

Just cause folks should not be fucking with you about how your avatar looks, does not mean you should be walking around SL injuring the optical nerves of everyone who sees you!! Fix that shit! If you choose to play SL as a human being could you please make your avatar in such a way as to not make us question your species?? Go into appearance and zoom OUT!! Look at your avatar in totality and make sure everything is proportional. If your chest is 3 miles wide why the FUCK is your head 2 millimeters around?! For the love of everything holy, if your waist is on 0, your titties and ass should NOT be on anything over 50 no matter what body you wear. Come on people. STOP IT!!

  • 4. Taking other folks’ ideas and claiming them as your own!

There is more than enough success to go around so that each and every single one of us can have a share. WHY the fuck do y’all feel like you can’t work with one another?? Why do y’all feel like it is okay to take something you’ve seen other people work their asses off to create, whether it’s an event, a service or an item, copy it and then claim it like you came up with the shit, never giving the originator of the idea any props or recognition? That’s not okay!

If you see someone else or another organization doing something that you think is dope, instead of copying them, why not go talk to them and see if maybe y’all could team up and do it together? All they can say is no and I promise you won’t die from a no, you won’t. If they say no (which is totally within their rights), please respect that. It’s their idea. Let them have it. If they say yes, then YAY! Together we can make this thing that was already awesome, even better! And y’all, if someone comes to you asking if you can collaborate, at least consider it. They may have an idea that takes your thing to the complete next level. They may bring a perspective to it that you never considered. Not everything is a competition! STOP IT!!!

  • 5. Taking your issues public.

ON GOD, I hope y’all stop this bullshit!! If you have a problem with someone, what can social media do to solve it?? NOT A DAMN THING!! If your point is valid, if you are as big and bad as you say you are, or if you know you are in the right, why do you need a peanut gallery cheering you on or validating your every word??

Grown people handle shit like adults. Which means addressing the muthafugga they have a problem with directly and in a manner befitting their status as an adult. If I have a problem with Susie, then Susie is the only bitch that can solve that problem for me. There’s not a single other person anywhere that can solve it but her. So what the fuck do I look like sharing it with a bunch of “friends” who aren’t my friends but who are just people who are bored scrolling their timelines hoping to find someone in a situation that is worse than their own so that they can feel better about their lives. “Hey, my cable is about to get turned off but at least I’m not this idiot fighting some chick she don’t know on Facebook over some dick/pussy she’s never even had before!! Man, my life seems better already!!” Ugh!! STOP IT!!

Those are just a few things I feel that SLiens need to leave behind when the clock stricks 12 AM on January 1, 2020. What would you add to this list? Comment below and let me know!

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